Our Neighbors are trying to steal our ducks!
im giving 12 year olds life advice. this is probably illegal somewhere.
This was all being yelled across a beer pong table as all important things should be discussed
I woke up naked in my own vomit. Not even in my bed. No one is happy.
Ah, I knew it wouldn't be long before my boobs were introduced into the conversation.
If he thought that flying across an ocean to visit me in London constituted sex, he thought wrong.
Your lower body and my face have had way too much contact lately.
He made me leave when I challenged "all you bitches" to a game of strip taboo.
Just explain how I got from the bar to a house I've never been in, waking up to a cop in uniform ripping a bong
I am honored my friend, to hold the decision of what enters your body
You just referred to a pillow with a stolen bra strapped to it as "she". Let that sink in for a minute.
you just rode your bike home from a one night stand in a stolen skirt with no underwear and you're telling ME to reevaluate life choices?!
going on fb and having 11 notifications all from you is absolutely horrifying
I think I got into an argument with my cat's former owner about what a BDSM relationship entails.
Woke up in a house I don't know, with someone else's pants on, and wolverine hair, to my girlfriend yelling on the phone about the 4 girls I made out with last
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