Saw a Delta Zeta recruitment poster today. On it, somebody added, "All you need is your daddy's credit card and a lack of self-respect."
if you made me into a cookie and threw me into a betty crocker easy bake oven on christmas morning...that's how baked i am
i just threw up in a potted plant at home depot
Well hey if hot cowboys are involved then all bets are off.
she was laying naked in the stream looking for "ribbays", which is apparently drunk for frogs.
I'm never telling my kids not to take ecstasy, never. Idk what my mom was thinking.
There was a punch bowl full of straight vodka. Glass bowl, ladle, vodka, and no punch at all. It was something of a rough night
im drunk. people are steering their children away from me. whatever it is that you called for, I assure you that I don't care. have a good night
I just beer bonged. Soco and spite please get on my levvl my hair is in buns
Just heard my neighbor say "I'm just gonna lay down in a coma until someone comes into my room and hands me a beer." He's got his priorities straight
Your message cut off at "shit on the floor". Your life is incredible.
all I'm saying is that my epic blow jobs have made grown professional football players cry in ecstasy
P.s. I loved that your balls smelled like coconut
Dude I asked him to get me beef jerky at 4 am and he actually walked to CVS to get it. CVS closes at 12 but it was the perfect opp to dip out
Refresh my memory....were we forced to leave or did we choose to leave?
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