So im using the back of a keystone box as notecard for my presentation
don't get me wrong, i love how you're fun and free spirited. but there are some situations...like shooting down a bottle of sambuca standing in the shallow end topless surrounded by my friends
I seriously just washed my dick in a public restroom. That's how dirty last night got
She just took off her shirt and jumped in the kiddie pool. We're not leaving.
This flask doesn't match my outfit. I hope the gays don't mind.
Either way you look at it, I'm a slut. But either way I look at it, I'm having a fucking blast.
Being the only sober one.. I had to feed you guys doritos. You kept licking my fingers.
She. Own s my pussycat. Roxk it like. The sun hitting the horizon
do you remember when we thought we were both knocked up by the same guy like two days apart and would have half twins? Thats a best friend moment.
Was almost hungover and got scared, skipped hungover, back to hammered. Fuck real life
I just used a baby fork as a roach clip. I am totally the cool aunt.
I guess you never know how much of an impact you have on someone until you sleep with their cousin
Do you think it's illegal to drive without your pants on?
Of fucking course I get my period on Valentine's Day...
I'm worried about us. We are almost 30 and we still drink jaeger bombs till we black out. Wait, no I'm not. I'm excited about us.
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