Crap im kindd 0f drunkk we just hooked up in a mcdonalds parking lot but i dont know why how we are here
I woke up with my face in a pile of pancakes and 3000 mistakes.
She's the rare girl who loses weight and gets uglier.
let me put it this way. im never saying "join in or get out" again unless i know whos in the room.
I've never seen a kid turn down a sure thing for a possible handy by a freshmen. You need to re-evaluate.
Im watching him eat cream cheese and hot dog buns.
she texted me out of nowhere. and I wanted to get drunk. like I didn't even have her new number until 6 hours ago and bam we were rolling around drinking cotton candy vodka from the bottle she had stuffed in a boot
There was a gay guy in drag passed out against the wall but we had sex in there anyway.
we can be functional adults and still think pizza lunchables are the shit
Toilet is so comfy. Serious question/why does weed make every surface feel like bed?
Trumps. I've been wiping my ass with fast food napkins for 3 days.
Found out last night that "Everclear" is Spanish for "shit got weird"...
I asked what you thought of her and you replied not the biggest I have had
Hey, you know that marble art statue thing in your bedroom? Hypothetically what would happen if a penis got stuck in it?
that may or may not have been my penis.
Randomize
