WE WERE REALLY IN A PORNO LAST NIGHT
the new roommate knocked on my door this morning holding a bong in one hand and my dennys leftovers from last night in the other. love this kid. Best student housing placement ever.
I saw your arrest video on youtube. you look so thin!
I'm 2 blowjobs away from girlfriend status....don't tell me I don't know how to have an adult relationship
He compared my vagina to the first time he tried cocaine
We were having sex and his high flatmates stood outside his room playing the guitar and singing Somebody to Love by Justin Beiber. Weirdest night ever.
Screw them and thier engaged asses. I've got liquor to drink and boys I don't know to make out with.
So I'm at the VFW tonight and the shot special here is straight 151 for 2 dollars. They must hate our livers
Very impressive. My GPA is the same amount of orgasms I can offer tonight (valid only tonight): 3.5
When he sent me a picture, I swear my vag frowned. That tiny.
I no longer exist. I have transformed into a puddle of sex.
I mean, on what planet are nipples suppose to look like that?
Also not to brag but I got high last night and got us a host family in a chateau in the south of France
Hold on...did you Instagram a picture of you and your boyfriend while you were sending me dirty snapchats?
if it makes u feel better, i skipped class so i could go to a sex convention in jersey a few hours earlier than if i went to class.
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