At an apparent methhead hillbilly bar and was smiling for a pic when one toothless wonder screamed "look at all them teeth"!
So im at the gym and some guy has a tattoo of a hand doing the shocker... The douche bag bar has been raised yet again.
the only plus side is that now I'll be able to tell my son not to trust the condoms that his college gives away..........
he opened the microwave and beer cans poured out
The bartender just told me he would have me face down in his pillow by the end of the night. I hate when you make me go to gay clubs.
Let's just say trying to drink my weight in apple pie shots looked better in theory.
We had on the same team jersey so at the time it made sense to hook up.
Duh.
I have no idea how I got home or why I am naked but I assume I owe you a thank you...
I just had nipple jewelry returned to me in the law library.
I will now send you explicit pics of mine and her genetalia bound together forever in the devils dance that is sexting.
I have a fantastic sense of humor but being called a merman isn't funny
I think I blacked out after I decided drinking alone on the trailered jetskis was a good idea
He left for work so I drank pickle juice from his fridge
She was a little thick, but we banged on the beach and fireworks went off as we finished so I think God wanted it
Are you going to regret this?
No I do t think so
Ok then he can enter the holy dorm temple.
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