he has a girlfriend so we used my stuffed animals to pretend to have sex
I would say the hottest chick there looked like Susan Boyle and the ugliest like Bea Arthur
Nice use of current day folklore
I'd do that. But we would need storm trooper helmets.
You can tell alot about a person by their poo.. For example, he was a smoker.
Not me. I think "beastiality" sounds pretty classy.
I was thinking about baking his mom "sorry you found out i was sleeping with your son" cupcakes
Just saved her as "new hostess that randy banged" ...I forgot her name
Just saw a field sobriety test being administered at 730 am, I now know I do not have a drinking problem
Is there a word for someone who only has sex with NFL prospects?
Just had flashback to me showering u with stir fry as u rythed on the floor
You're the only person not starstruck by him
Yes. That tends to happen after you regularly lick someone's balls.
Twice. I only peed my pants twice tonight.
this is the second night in a row i've fucked a guy i met on craigslist. and it wasn't even a post for sex. i posted a housing ad. A HOUSING AD
we decided to take the jello everclear shot at the party...didnt think it tasted any different....o dear god...the regret..
Life is clearly unfair. You remember Courtney has three older sisters, well they're all "make baby sister look like a four" hot. I knew I shouldn't go home with her.
Randomize
