WTF I just almost got ran over by a fucking cop!!!!!!
LOL you shoulda thrown yourself in front for money. Fucking cops!
I fink we're distracting them from bumping the proverbial uglies
she offered me iced tea and went to go change.then her dad came in the door.i thought i was on how to catch a predator.
im typing and i feel like my hands are on backwards.
Stop texting me, I'm right here.
Please advise as to how precisely ashamed I should be if I just became sexually aroused by a Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince preview
im in Michaels with rachel and i see a little boy jumping around and waving a rainbow pompom. Welcome to our team little one
If we were unicorns we would fly together. Like in a pack. A pack of flying unicorns.
We're going clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
What will that accomplish?
It will accomplish clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
Sorry if this is weird, but please don't have sex in my truck. I get to be the first...
She's dressed as a slutty goth schoolgirl. Those are my three favorite things. God himself could not give me whiskey dick.
I am currently in a U-Haul truck right now. Going to a party. I hate myself.
Kings cup with teenagers tonight
Done deal
Signs of a stoner: trying everything in your fridge topped with peanut butter to seek satisfaction.
I got a blow torch for Christmas. You are now permitted to be afraid.
I have hobbies that aren't destroying myself and others...i can make hats.....
Randomize
