puked in the new hous. now it's officially home.
so he must've not known that your lastname is Came because everytime someone would say your name he would scream "NO SHE DIDNT" to the whole party. He must've not been too good then either.
i was in the bathroom puking my brains out, a girl walked in and said "i just came to do the same thing" so i told her i would move over and share the toilet. its better than being alone.
He'd bedazzaled his ass. Im not even that gay...
He tried to write down the address for the cab on half a bagel.
They installed a lotion dispenser in the bathroom at work... its like they want me to masturbate on the clock...
obviously he wasnt ready for this jelly and you can quote me on that
Feel better punkin. Your balls will be gently resting on my forehead in no time
We have your weave and dirt in our room.
Just opened up the freezer to find chocolate penis popsicles. Too hungover for this shit
You'll pass into the great gay beyond
Where it rains cosmopolitans and scantily clad gogo dancers of all genders direct traffic
And I wasn't CONVICTED of a felony, I just committed one
The sex was so boring I heard the people having sex next door and I wanted to stop just to listen
I'm crying watching Rihanna at the VMAs. Periods are a bitch
Well shit I mean if you get a bunch of cashed up drunk lesbians together in a casino, it's bound to go south at some point
Randomize
