they started playing Don't Stop Believin' and you had a melt down because it wasnt the Glee version
Wait, we're on the hunt for addys and explosives. They're both in this house somewhere.
Somebody spraypainted a transformers head on a transformer box..my life is complete
sometimes i think what itd be like to be a firework
Sun* burn. But that sounds like wait.. Midsentence thought... It would be like swimming in a giant bowl of cereal.. Only I would be cereal. This is brilliant.
Thanks, college. Tonight's decisions brought to you by margs in a nalgene.
its like the body should be a temple but we treat it like a kmart
Found the puke drawer
It's one of those things you just need to see in person at least once in your life. Like Niagara falls or some shit. His ass is the Niagara falls of asses
WTF? Why is there a pic of my tits in ur dad's office?
Just in case you blacked out, we had sex, you came in me, we need plan B, we fell off your top bunk, broke your roommates chair, i still like you, but i'm in pain and am going to bed
There are way too many people I have fucked in this class for this not to be awkward
When you wake up and wonder why your bleeding and it feels like you jumped into a ceiling fan, dont worry. Ill explain it all when I wake up.
All three of the bartenders here have screwed my boss, so he's definitely gay. Unfortunately for you he seems to have a type and you're not it.
He may not be good for my soul but he’s great for my vagina!
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