She made the grapes disappear! ALL OF THEM!!!
Hey i just realized that im masturbating in the exact same kind of chair that they are doing it on in this porno
He wouldn't know what to do with his penis even if they made a "how to get a blowjob for dummies" guide
I asked him where the store BJ's was and he unzipped his pants.
all i wanna do is slam about 38 beers eat a whole pizza and wake up naked in the taco bell parking lot
Just turned my microbiology homework into a drinking game. The words are getting blurry but I think we're really bonding.
You layed on my kitchen floor with a pile of m&ms at your crotch, said "your lightbulb don't match, is that one new?"
This is love.
Which part? The alcoholic cupcakes or the lesbian st paddys day party?
do you know how much drugs we can buy now that you got that raise at work
I ripped my favorite jeans crossing that fence
That sucks
It's an upgrade! I didn;t even have to unzip my pants to pee!
Saying someone's good at giving head is like saying someone is good at pouring juice like there is that one girl who will spill it everywhere but for the most part it's not that hard to be good at
Turns out Edward 40 hands and life-sized jenga is really hard...Didn't stop you from trying. How is your concussion?
Oh hell no my vagina is on that screenshot
Oh. Why can't it be something easy, like a punch card for blowjobs?
I have to touch the horse lube. :-(
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