living well may be the best revenge, but it doesn't hurt that my exhusband is now dating a BEAST.
why didn't we just drop out of school years ago and become dominatrix bitches who beat men?
I don't know but we should still do that
...so how do you feel about living with a lesbian next year?
hhaha i just laughed out loud when i read that
is that a "i laughed because im fine with it" or "im a republican" ?
I saw Winona at my church today. She has boobs, now.
Miracles do happen.
just peed on my foot to get a spider off. that lazy.
Random girl at this party just gave me a lap dance in a la-Z-boy. Night significantly improved.
Oh god the guy I took underwear from at the bar is trying to add me as a friend on facebook now.
I've been laying here all day wondering why my back hurt so bad and then I remembered last night.... When you pushed me through that glass table.
Telling the family you're going for a run, getting dressed in workout clothes, and then walking halfway around the block and smoking a joint. This is my life
Oddly enough, the sex change dream i had made me miss you more.
Also I would love to pregame at your place if I weren't stuck at mine drinking laxatives
SHE'S PREGNANT AS SHIT, AND I JUSR PEELED A CLEMENTINE TO CHASE SHOTS WITH!! COULD LIFE GET ANY BETTER!?
I smoked a joint in the bathtub at 8 am then went back to bed
Oh damn it. Let me get a beer. I can't take anymore bad news. Hold on.
Can I borrow a thong? I’m having drinks with a cute boy tonight and I’m out of clean underwear
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