Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
Can we comment on the fact that at five thirty this morning, security woke me up in the hotel lobby, in my underwear, and some random guys winter coat?
A lesson I learned in the hospital....when you masturbate while attached to a heart monitor, it scares the nurses a lot.
I seriously dont think i have ever ridden a horse sober.
they ran out of ice so they are using frozen shrimp in their drinks
I can practically hear my vag and my conscience fighting.
all I know is he gave me a Cialis and tried to take me home.
You Were screaming "Im trying to get it in" and "stop cock blocking" while i threw you in the car
Well right now I am watching him use the fire extinguisher off the pourch.
He wasn't lying when he said he was immune to pepperspray. He pretended it burned for like 12 seconds and told the cops he was kidding he was alright. We'll be there soon.
I found him in bed on a pullout couch with another dude. He had two empty puke buckets and his empty bottle of jagermeister right by his head.
You missed lesbians having sex in the bathroom and the whole bar clapping for them. I had to do recon. It was amazing
I am eating deep fried cinnamon rolls and I found a lighter in my sprinkles. I miss you.
Headphones came off my phone same time as The Weeknd sang "Who's gonna fuck you like me?"...Everyone at work heard it.
i asked your drunk ass where the fuck you were going and you screamed “WENDY’S BITCH”.
Randomize
