So I got my period. Finally. In related news, I reinstated my belief in God.
i just heard my neighbor say from outside my window "i don't give a shit what he does, what the hell am i gonna do with my son's penis?"
bang him and never speak to him again. also, queef in his face.
i dont this its possible to queef on command.
I just put a picture of what I imagine Rob's dick looks like on it on my vision board. thank you Oprah!
Want to come to my BBQ and Blow party?
Just did ten shots in 8.34 minutes........ Slowly getting over the loss
I woke him up this morning and said I have a meeting w my advisor in an hour you need to wake up, cum on my face, and take me to my car.
Don't byou dare ruin egg salad by putting your penis in it that would be so sad.
It's ok for me to have his baby but I can't be his friend on fb. Wth is wrong with this
It's my first ever "i'm sorry for my excessive drug use" hand turkey. And I think it's pretty boss.
We fucked then made friendship bracelets, his mother taught him right!
Did you put pizza in my boxers last night?
I left you 4 hours ago. Have you been walking around with shit in your pants all day?
I climbed out a window to pee last night because i thought i was locked in the room... Then crawled back in and went to bed. The poor neighbors.
New fuck buddy and long time fuck buddy are carpooling home for thanksgiving. #10hrconvoaboutmyblowjobskills
I'm gonna make out with this 38 yr old. Mark my words. I don't even have daddy issues.
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