Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
I think I kinda wanna bone that ginger from Harry Potter.
You literally just made my flesh crawl.
I'm thinking we should try to start remembering stuff we do. Althought I kinda like feeling like Nancy Drew the next morning.
More like the Hardy Boys cause its kinda like a team effort.
It's called the eyeliner-blowjob correlation, read a science book bro
Please don't smoke the bong in the bathroom while you shit. It is not a shitting bong.
you and him went to the park at 2am to "catch a pigeon" and ACTUALLY CAME BACK WITH A PIGEON
He was telling me about how he's leaving on his Mission next week... While we were having sex in the back of his car.
Stop getting drunk and running away. I can'tell chase you. Iim in heels and have big boobs. Running is a bad idea for me.
Double dirt bag award winner tonight. He picked me up in his wife's car.
The body is still out there. I don't think my trainer realized when he asked me not to drink for 24 days, how often I see dead people
remind me again why we thought drinking hungarian moonshine was a good idea
Well, if I'm gonna go gay, it's gonna be for NPH
We were dancing and then he pointed to the club floor and there was money that I dropped everywhere. That was the nicest thing someone has ever done for me.
And on the way out from Applebee's he tried to take the basket of toothpicks claiming he was using them as a tax write off. Last time I babysit my dad on thirsty Thursday.
This lady is talking to me and all I can think about is getting face fucked and doing cocaine. Not neccesarily together and not neccesarily in that order
Randomize
