Did he leave or is he still there?
He left right away, I might have passed out. I saw your text and was like who left where? Then the oh shit feeling sunk in, hangover starting now.
I vaguely remember telling people they were not trash cans
you threw up in someones recycling bin and left a note apologizing. how drunk do you think you were?!
i bought a pregnancy test with dimes. Is that trashy?
Pre-St Patricks Day Log: Threw up across a 14ft radius, this is why the irish dont drink tequila
Why would vodka do this to me? I've always been loyal
He refused my I'm sry gift of ANAL. That's how angry he was.
I'm here to help build your repertoire of drunken shenanigans and I should have been arrested stories
No. 70% of the female population would find them attractive. The other 30% are lesbian and even they would appreciate them for their strong bodies and athletic capabilities.
Never start off a conversation with "speaking of STD's..."
Just had an orgasim to the Star Spangled Banner so.. it was all worth it.
I thought my holiday spirit was gone this year until I got banged to Christmas music. It's back.
I don't know where I'm at. But I'm pretty sure what I'm looking at is a small bear.
Do you think it's illegal to drive without your pants on?
But I think I successfully seduced her with my alias.
Randomize