she was screaming in french about how classy it was to be drinking wine. oh... she was drinking it out of the bottle. with a beer in her other hand while throwing up.
He sat on a barstool and did the robot for 3 hours - I'm pretty sure he enjoyed himself.
A 12 year old Canadian kid said I was a pussy for only buying a 28-pack. I fit in better in this country.
Just saw ur booking photo. Love that u were already wearing orange. Its like u knew
Some girl, somewhere, is going to wake up with my face paint on her vagina
This is three metal detector wands away from being the strangest porn I have ever been in the audience for.
Favorite thing said to me in 2012: It's like you have two tongues!
Were you keeping a list?
I think that thing where I have 2 boyfriends is happening again
She jumped on a table and took off her shirt and started yelling things that no one understood. For being 3, she has a dead on impression of a drunk party girl.
Also I know you probably did not understand anything I said on the phone last night but thank you for pretending.
He called me kiddo. We can't have sex
Please wake up and help me figure out how I woke up on the floor with my head under the couch
You know that episode of Spongebob where Patrick teaches Spongebob to be fancy? His dick was like that, only fancier.
Taco Bell is better for you than cocaine, I promise.
Did you really think putting a napkin over your head would make you giving him a bj less obvious?
Randomize
