he sent me a naked picture of himself. things got awkward really quickly. but on a positive note he shaved his chest
btw, her name was actually Alixx. in retrospect, it was pretty much a gimme
Do you understand how much easier life would be if fannypacks were normal
so, what part of "he's slept with a guy" do you not understand?
Min and u sung xhionubjs. Cause that's what u kiij like a xhionunk
Sorry 4 leaving u in the dumpster last night
I'm in too deep with Breaking Bad. I realized I've altered my Tinder likes to people that either look like Jesse or work in a school's Science department.
I DESERVE A BEADED TATTOOED MAN I'VE WANTED ONE FOR SO LONG
BEARDED TATTOOED MEN ARE PEOPLE AND NOT THINGS TO BE GIVEN FREELY
So what happened? Or does sex + ramen pretty much cover it?
I feel like I should treat myself every time I find out I'm not pregnant. Is there a pie company that delivers??
I JUST GOT WOKEN UP TO HIM PISSING ON ME SAYING "IT HAS TO HAVE WATER TO GO TO THE BATHROOM" AND AFTER HE FINISHED HE DIDNT REMEMBER DOING IT
Do not confuse my plans for being an adult though. I will ABSOLUTELY be practicing suturing, on my porch, while getting stoned.
Well he had a nice beard and it smelled good so there was no way I wasn’t going home with him.
Long story short I ended up getting choked out by a really hot guy in the girls bathroom at a bar last night
I'm a teacher who's always telling kids about the importance of due diligence, yet I'm eating an avocado out of a coffee filter because I'm too lazy to wash dishes
Randomize
