Fuck appropriateness.
I will give everyone a free pointer today. Here it goes, always pee by the house late at night to avoid getting shot by drunk bastards with guns. Never go by the tree line.
Having sex with her was like reading the Wall Street Journal.
the choice between paying your electricity bill and getting herpes medicine is a tough one.
just had to shower sitting down. i hope this isn't an indicator of how the rest of my week is going to go.
She took a break from repeating "my face is still buzzing!" to say that the phantom of the opera could be here
I'm naked and wearing a cowbell.i love med school.
Apparently last night I yelled "the cops were called on a mother fucker and that mother fucker is me." And then proceeded to exorcise a sandwitch.
I do not love him. There is no love. Only sex and meatloaf.
He walked upstairs in nothing but his boxers and drunkenly asked my brother for a condom....so much for a good first impression.
I think we might need a safe word for this...
On another note, I think my upstair neighbor is having sex. How awkward would it be if I showed up to her door with a bag of Chipotle?
I’ve gotta be honest, I didn’t expect to have sex. I didn’t shave... anything. You couldn’t have been impressed.
i woke up to drewlling on a plate of eggrolls half naked halfway between my bed and the floor, and i have no idea where my pants went
I'm like a camel in the desert in a black hole I'm so thirsty.
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