Thanks for last night it was amazing as always
What are you talking about
You've got to be kidding me
Btw I've read that book you bought me...And I'm such a bitch now
But I don't think guys love me
i just walked with a girl who was carrying a chair down the street. apparently she got mad at the bartender and took the bar stool when she left.
In Denver there are more bars per capita than any other city also the healthiest city. That means lots of drunk girls and no fatties.
doing a walk of shame covered in blue food coloring is only embarrassing if you make it embarrassing...actually no its embarrassing on all accounts
And I also succeeded in getting kicked out of a bar when I was drinking straight from the vodka bottle at our table.
Birthday are for suffering. TAke some tylenol pm and day-drink tomorrow
The "don't have sex with him again" alerts you set on my phone just started going off.
Good. "Seriously, don't do it" should start in about five minutes.
True love: he brought me a margarita while I was n the shower. He's a keeper.
to answer your questions bluetooth, 30ft, like a tampon, ask her, her idea, got tired of trying to find her in crowed clubs
Ok I'm drunk as fuck already at 529 and this waitress started flirting with me, I wanna bang her for acknowledging my existence
You may be fancy. But you'll never be having cheesy garlic bread and scotch at 3am fancy.
in the past 2 days I've ruined2-3 lives, made 2 men quit the bar, started a Wednesdays only affair, ended it, ruined that engagement and had my tires slashed by a jealous bouncer. please stop letting me out....
I had more orgasms than hours of sleep this weekend. I’m going to keep him around a while
I need to go to St. Louis more often. The brides sorority sisters were practically fighting over me once they heard I work on Wall St.
Randomize
