just walked out of chelsea's house and saw cameron slapping his dick against her car. cant even make this shit up if i tried.
See it, we're so close, i smell your vagisil
i just made a girl do the walk of shame. as a bumblebee. i love halloween.
VITAMINS IN VODKA. IM NOT LYING.
Target doesn't accept your signature for your credit card if you draw a dick on the pad. Even of your name is Richard.
Your headphones are on the door knob and I left you a burger on the door step.
I remember saying to him "Fun fact! If you lie this way it's easier to deep throat!" I even judge me.
He tried to stop traffic by waving his half eaten pizza at cars.... And we were stupid enough to cross .....??!!!
Did you put Dave Matthews band on the playlist? It's really hard to funnel when "Crash Into Me" kicks in.
I need to be her Aladdin, and show her the world. The sex world.
He stopped me mid blowjob and asked me to take off my hat. He said it made him feel like Neil Young was going down on him.
Well I'm sorry I assumed you were a human and that humans have the capability to forget sometimes.
You have to get it done early. Like a dick drive by. Hit it and run.
I got wing sauce on the baby and licked it off. If you were wondering how I'm doing.
Sitting in the dr office she literally looked at my throat and goes have you been having oral intercourse
Randomize
