their songs make me feel all the things I wanna feel. Ya dig?
and what kinds of feelings would these be?
Happy, horny, occasionally hungry
pissed the bed twice, first one side then rolled over , other side. boom.
ok shes still asleep, should i pee on her and say she did it herself? and by the time you respond to this ill probably have already made the decision
a man that wears gold spandex underwear and party boys other people is a man after my own heart.
Ambien does the same to me. One time that I took it, I got this huge bowl of spaghetti out of the fridge and thought it was a castle and that the meatballs were little slaves. I ate all of them first and then the noodles were the soldiers and the sauce was the water in the moat. And when I finished, I fell up the stairs and threw it all up.
well he's currently spooning the coffee table
He couldn't say anything coherently but shot off a perfectly timed "that's what she said" when michelle said he'd have to ride in the trunk because she didn't have enough room up front.
$1 margaritas. This happy hour needs to end.
Just remembered I hit myself in the face with a bottle then did the nose test and decided I was still good. Don't think anyone noticed.
I've never felt so inclined to grow a dick. THIS is what the gays in this town have done to me
One thing noone tells you about getting put in the drunk tank is do it barefoot. You get free flipflops.
Out of desperation, I used the leftover sauce from my goat masala as a mixer for vodka shots.
I just threw in a dip with a guy that superglued his fake tooth back in today. My life is complete.
Thought about you all night last night, then I fucked the shit out of my boyfriend. Win win for me.
She made me baby bird juul smoke to her while we were fucking
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