I told u I don't really remember everything lol i pretty much remember not lasting as long as I norm and that I wore a condom, I hate condoms
considering you've had every STD known to man, you think if i sent you a picture of my dick (no homo) you could tell me whats growing on it?
It just feels so wrong throwing away the condoms into her Hello Kitty trashcan
it's a little hard to watch the basketball games with my family considering they keep cheering for the guy that i had a one night stand with...
So Ryan had to wash the dishes. His solution: take a shower with them. I'm never eating at his house again.
i like him when i'm sober AND when i'm drunk.i've been searching for this my whole life
First lesson of the year: don't close the bar on mondays
I seriously might throw up right now. In class. Sunglasses on. I'm getting too old for this.
My fingers feel amazing. Their going like 100 MPH!!
HOLY SHIT. SHIT THAT IS HOLY. HOLY OF THE SHIT.
i came so hard i kicked through my windshield
NOTHING IN THE WORLD IS GOOD SOFT
NOT ICECREAM NOT DICKS
NOTHING
Its honestly only a matter of time before I punch him in the face... I'll try to control myself until you guys break up
i asked him to talk to me in french while we fucked and halfway through i caught the word 'lasagna'. turns out he was making his grocery list.....i asked him to keep going.
When you're trying to sneak from the bathroom to your room with dildo, but it glows in the dark and suddenly your entire life is illuminated in the shape of dick
I'm sure if Robin Williams was still with us he would want you to see boobs.
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