So after i got done, she went over and got out her gecko, I felt like I was in an X rated geiko commercial.
do you ever facebook stalk someone so much you think their inside jokes are yours?
my cabbie only has one arm...this can't be safe
That combination of brocholi bacon eggs cheese ketchup and pasta would have been a revaltion had you not thrown up on the stove and put out the pilot light
Now I'm at the gym and I never want to leave. It's a combo of adderall and endorphins and I don't want it to go away
He corrected my use of grammar... I think we both know that means i have to sleep with him
i'm gonna fuck his crew, i'm gonna wax my asshole. i'm gonna make them all cry tears of sex joy then move to colorado.
Having to explain to my dad why there are chicken wings to the pool filter, new low.
i am willing to donate my body to this science experiment when it means free blowjobs
I'm developing all these feelings it's disgusting.
Feels like I ran a marathon last night. A tequila marathon.
I mean I could but due to my age and being a mother and all I feel it's poor judgment to give fellatio in a public establishment.
I sent him a blank text because I didn't want to "drunk text" him.
Fuck you, i'm all jacked up on bananas lets go somewhere
I stared at his dick and then told him to get on his knees
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