so evidently yelling "gay" everytime your bf tells you how he feels is cause for breakup. news to me
just walked by a lingerie store, the sign out front, "Specials for Father's Day", in no way is that just not wrong.
Why must guys tell girls who are a little bigger that "they like a girl with meat on her bones?" Yeah needless to say he went home alone
I've heard semen is good for your skin though, so that pimple on my chin should clear right up.
I was so drunk i thought Kathy Griffin was funny
it was really awkward..i thought he had two dicks, but later realized it was jsut his roommate
Yeah that's one way to look at it on the other hand MY FUCKING BED CAUGHT ON FUCKING FIRE
It'd be a romantic, consensual abduction
YOU LET ME GO HOME WITH CREEPY RON JEREMY?!?
...and?
I hate when you're right.
You can't mix blow jobs, bacon, and Star Wars.
A) just did. And b-z) that sounds like a great Sunday morning.
The minute he showed me his Mumford and sons tattoo is the minute i could literally feel my pussy dry up
I've got five complains from the landlord about she being too loud during sex in two weeks I'm marrying her
Getting blackout drunk infront of my family was never on my bucket list, but now that I've done it I'm cool with it.
You some how ended up sleeping on one of the beams that run along the ceiling of your house
She sent a group text pic called "Assemble" of his dick next to her forearm.
I'm down.
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