so I'm never txting u again after today...
y?
cuz i don't wanna see it on blogspot :)
ha...too late
Remember that time I came into your room after taking a muscle relaxant and we argued about what state has the longest coastline?
there are so many fish in the see you have left to fuck
We went to red robin and there was a 15 minute wait so we went and fucked in the car. Quickies, endless fries, and a mascot handing out balloons- this is literally the night of my dreams.
she works at a police station now. i think thats the definition of keeping your enemies closer.
I saw a 60 yr old mans penis last night. Just for the record.
Dude, you sent that text at 9:44 AM. Who thinks of drugs that early?
Whore. There is deli meat in my wallet.
I woke up naked wrapped in my roommate's towel with one leg shaved and money thrown all over the room. Happy 21st birthday.
Why the fuck is he under my phone as Papi Chulo?
These girls just walked into this party as reverse cowgirls... Wearing cowboy clothes all backwards
So i stood up out of the sunroof while he gave me oral. Car was still moving. Exactly how illegal is that?
Granted every 20 shifts of working there you seem to be on par to receive some sort of racy satisfying sexual encounter which money can’t buy
The lady at the liquor store in my hometown just gave ran around the corner and gave me a hug when I came back from being gone for a couple months. My life is complete.
He’s disease free and drives a Porsche. What else does a girl need?
Randomize