Bc you can definitely buy condoms if ur a 14 year old girl
38 yer olds are good kisserssss
my dad just encouraged me to do a kegstand
is it bad if I use the term bowl as a measurement of time, as in how long it takes to smoke a bowl?
please tell me you didn't have sex with him in the bathroom...
Does an alley count?
mom found the triscuts in her underwear drawer, its done.
Don't ever tell me I'm a bad friend. I woke up at 7 this morning to drive your mistake home because you wouldn't get up.
I've done nothing but whore my gay ex bf out for the past 48 hours. It's getting weird.
Itd be like fucking a waterbed thats been locked in a barn for two years.
Where in the FUCK do you get your analogies
Breaking up as roommates was a poor life decision. I'm sorry. Thank you for never shitting on the floor.
They ran out of toilet paper, so I had a girl rip down the streamers so I could wipe.
He sent a video of him jacking off....class will be awkward tomorrow
Why is there a wet sock in my garbage? Why did I chug so much red wine? Why was someone signing into my iCloud account at 4 am in China? Why do I do self-destructive reckless things? So many questions.
My one night stand ended up seeing me the next morning... For my interview. Guess who got a job.
Well I thought I saw everything and then I saw Christmas themed poop bags at Petco.
Randomize
