what happened last night??
everyone saw ******'s vagina
and that's just the beginning
everytime someone famous vagina shows up in pics, i have to go check my own vagina to make sure mine dont look all wrinkledy and flabby like that....i want my lips plump and succulent
you know how i said i wouldn't send that pic message of your lofted bed falling from you fucking a fat chick? that was after i sent it to your mom
I just found blacked-out interviews on my voice recorder. Go journalism.
Someone played tic tac toe on my abs?
She tried to leave the threesome and I heard you yell "Hey! We don't quit at halftime!"
honestly i just want a cigarette and someone to go down on me... are you interested in helping with either of those
Welp just pooped in a garbage can. Guess I'm not better than you at life in any aspect.
You know this who 'I show my love by being a total dick' thing is getting old, right?
NO I WOULD NOT GET A GUMMER FROM A GRANDMOTHER
Can you get the drug form of snow for the blizzard this weekend?
Yeah. I asked if there was a finger in my ass at some point or if I had a weird dream. So far he hasn't responded
He sent me nudes and then a text asking if I tried the new Cantina Bowl from Taco Bell. He sure does romance right, doesn't he?
look, im sorry that i yelled at your little brother, threw my car keys at him and smashed a stale cookie with a pool cue, but i swear to god i didn't poop on the floor. it was one of your dogs.
I just group texted a dick pic. Wonder who'll respond back first. Ashley Stacey or my stepmom
Randomize
