So. Did i wake up at 430, try to drive home, stop to throw up at a shell, and try to clean out my car and drop my keys in a full dumpster? Yes.
we need to get ahold of those "sexting" teens on tyra. HAWT!
wasnt one 13?
Y do pigs give u trufles on farmville? I WANT BACON YOU FUCKING PIG!
FYI angry masturbation is not as cool angry sex
proof that my night is going well: I can still open doors
My professor just told me I'm living a lie and I found puke on my pants. How do you think it's going?
My new dealer is 16. I have been getting high longer than he has been alive.
I don't see the problem
Woke up on the stairs at my parents house. Good start to vacation.
After sex he cried I didn't know what to do so I patted him on the back and went to the kitchen to make waffles
He also reminds me slightly of a pirate which i find strangely attractive
Haven't sucked a dick since mid December. In crisis mode.
is it fucked up if I wear crotchless panties to thanksgiving to make it easier for me to fuck my cousins friend.
God I love you.
I look excited, but its just a facade.
Typical. We're ready to go, and you're not wearing pants.
I’m gonna stop you right there. The last time you had a “brilliant” idea, I woke up to my kitchen covered in flour and a javelin through my tv.
Randomize