I was watching truelife I'm transgendered. This tranny already got a date a week after getting a vagina. I've had a vagina my entire life and can't get a date.
my underwear are soaked with white zifandel yet i have continued to wear them despite the fact im at home
She passed out in my bed last night before anything happened. She felt really bad about that, so she gave me head when we woke up this morning.
"must pass the hog line" should not only be used in curling. but also when we go out to pick up girls.
that bitch in the red sedan is still teasing me with the ice cream cone. i'm going to show her my dick
All I could think about while he was going down on me was that his moustache reminded me that I want to try something new with my pubic hair.
I didn't know whether to laugh at the fact that a dog bit his balls or throw up cause my dad was telling me a story involving his balls.
He called some chick he used to fuck for cash to get food delivered to cheer me up
I need someone to play with my boobs. Even platonically. I just need a good groping
Pandora was on point with the sex music tonight
In tonight's episode of Travis' Fucked up Sex Life, Travis breaks into a building at Tulane to have sex with an attractive Asian man.
PS- My flight is being emergency landed bc someone smuggled cats on the plane.
He said my vagina is harder to escape than the Temple of Doom.
How did I get up here...did jesus lift me up
Played Gay Bar on the jukebox and pissed off the Republicans here. Best day before birthday ever.
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