if there is a rhyme for it it must be true
If a guy called my cleavage "mesmerizing" but is kinda related to me, does it still count?
I am so horny I keep driving over the rumble strips... best half hour ever.
and I asked her"are you allergic to condoms latex like your older sister " she said "Idk this is gonna be my 1time"
I was just texting to see if your vagina was working yet.
yup. cregs moms pubic hair is still glued to the celing
We decided to have a girls night of four lokos, three of us cried and the other puked
Woke up to a break up text for a facebook relationship I didn't even know I was in... 2012 is going to be a good year
Now I'm at the gym and I never want to leave. It's a combo of adderall and endorphins and I don't want it to go away
Girl, he can't tell you not to take a bump just because you work tomorrow. You're on a wedding diet, remember?
Nah, he's definitely here somewhere. Whether he survived the night or not is your problem, but I'm pretty sure he's around.
Thanks for launching me off you reverse cowgirl. I think I chipped a tooth.
Can I just text her like "yo sorry I fucked your boyfriend, let's go get sushi" or like nah
Yah. Then he started clapping my boobs together in his hands and started shouting "the seas are angry!"
Only good thing about being an essential worker is that I have a letter allowing me to cross the bridge into jersey to get booze
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