Michelle and I recorded her bunny humping it's little rubber black ball.
Omg. Get me out of here. Someone is playing michelle branch.
He has some good qualities. Beneath the layers of asshole and fat.
I would have been "that girl" at the party last night if it wasn't for that girl who puked in the potted plant...
Nobody is wearing shirts anymore. What is happening.
I should do something nice for her. Like sign her up for "What Not To Wear."
In the middle of pouring my wine you asked me if I could hear your vibrator from my room.
She Kept going around and squirting jello shots into guys mouths. That was her ice breaker.
Mom looked at me, frowned, and said "it makes me sad to see you drink before noon.." So i told her if she doesn't like it she needs to stop waking me up before noon.
You have set the bar insurmountably high with apple pie and buttsex.
I can see their wedding vows now: 'Til basicness do us part
Okay first of all, that is a sick ass nickname please call me that forever. Second, i need your help.
I was just tongue fucked into oblivion.
COME TO THE TOP OF THE MOUNTAIN AND I WILL GIVE YOU MY SAGE ADVICE.
How did the surgery go?
My face feels like a marshmallow.
Randomize
