When I saw him standing at full height, I realized exactly how much his body structure reminds me of his penis.
similar to the time we made up the game of screaming at the top of our lungs any time a guy any of us slept with walked into the party. that went over SO well.
STOP acting like a freshman, you have a drivers liscence now AND a PERSCRIPTION for birth control. Dont give all sophmores a bad name. Woman Up
Taking jello shots out of a big bowl from a measuring spoon. holla atcha boy.
I am intoxicated and cannot bring you a burrito. However, if you want to bring ME one...
I don't know bro, all I could remember is that he kept saying hallelujah and calling that girl Slutimus Prime
Jacked up my neck and shoulder hanging on for dear life while I rode him like a boss. Plus my house smells like broccoli, bad! How's YOUR morning?
Maybe it's because I walked straight up to that shelf of vodka with a look of determination that said "I mean business".
I usually have to have a cart! If that doesn't say "I mean business" then I don't know what does
Dude we gotta go back to your cabin. left glenn. he's calling me crying and still drunk
Guess who just enrolled into online classes at Hogwarts? This gal.
We should try to put a bagel on your penis
Isis wins if we don't have the loudest, kinkiest sex in every part of my house tomorrow
But if you move out who will get drunk with me on the roof and yell at boys?!?
It's routine now. He comes home from work and i ride him like a cowgirl with only a few sips of wine. I love being his neighbor.
I'm getting drunk off Malibu and watching Drag Race and it's only 2 in the afternoon. I'm the poster child for sad gay men.
Randomize
