he said i was weird because i want to have sex in public places.
i dont think thats weird i think thats fun
i forgot to tell you, he fell asleep outside my house again last night, but im weird
sometimes i wish i was able to text my cat and tell him i miss him and that i'm thinking about him
I don't care. I'm going to fuck John's friend and it's all your fault.
im not picky. i just want someone whod go down on me while im writing my psych midterm paper. thats not a lot to ask.
they pretty much knew i was there to get drunk and fuck their daughter
When i say that im working late and also have a paper to write before 9am tomorrow all i want u to respond is saying that ur gunna come over and sexually distract me from my responsibilities. Not a fucking frowny face.
Sorry. Im on my way.
Slept in my car last night. It snowed. I peed on the street. Hello 29...
Is that a tongue signal to get over there? That's how my two heads are taking it.
Wait does semen show up on blood tests?
seriously, i never want to drink Robitussin again. her face was melting as i tried to convince her i wasnt high and i probably would have fucked ray. his parents thought i was a sweet charming lesbian.
This is why you are not allowed out in public.
I be dancing. See you soon. You can drink tequila from my pants.
Yeah yeah I know I have to bring your dog back.
Maybe why that's why I'm perpetually single... I can't find a guy with bigger balls than mine.
Went to go look for a friend that was missing since 3am, found her passed out in the hallway of the apartment, guessing it was a good night
Woke up way too warm in the middle of a spooning sandwich. Was working up a rant about still not wanting a threesome. Then I realized the littlest spoon was the dog. Might need to break up anyway.
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