do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
Would you rather have a 10 inch but pencil thin penis or a 2 inch very fat one?
Fat, it's not about touching the bottom it's about raising hell of the sides.
'fingered' and 'feelings' NEVER belong in the same sentence.
I mixed the ketchup wit the mustard in one bottle to save time making hotdogs
You know the gilmore girls would be alright if it was on mute the whole time
It totally doesn't make me a groupie if I hooked up with him before he was in the Olympics
so yeah i told her you were going to become a doctor and the first thing she said was "i still don't want to fuck him". i tried.
I never thought I would say this but I have to clean queso off my vibrator
The last bar we left there was a sausage stand right outside and I apparently felt bad those guys were working that late, so I bought a $9 sausage, gave it to some drunk kid and said "I support local businesses!!" I'd say I've done my civic duty.
Boobs speak an international language.
She shit all over my seat. She is not allowed in my car under any circumstances. Not even with drugs. You can't forgive a shit.
I'm gonna take a nap by the fireplace and pretend like I know what day it is.
I woke up on a boat next to an extremely attractive man wearing nothing but a life jacket. Neither one of us owns a boat...
I just revenge puked in his shoes. This is gonna be a fun night :)
What's your fascination with fucking to the Lion King Soundtrack?
Randomize
