please quote me on this- the only thing worse than being ugly is being ugly and thinking that you're pretty
Does puking on your bio final mean I can retake it?
There are lots of gay asians. This is better than i was expecting
She counted 5,6,7,8 then intentionally kneed herself in the eye numerous times.
I made out with Jen. We were naked. I'm still gay. Forever
I've decided to be proactive and make a sex playlist on my phone to avoid any awkward moments in my upcoming slutty summer
Today is leap day..... If that's not an excuse to blackout all day I don't know what is
Do you think wearing a shirt that says I like penis is too much for tonight?
YOU CHEATED ON ME WITH THE WOMAN THAT IS STAYING AT YOUR HOUSE. FORGIVE ME IF IM NOT THINKING YOUR A DEDICATED BOYFRIEND.
"you can only have my number if you answer all the questions on this trivial pursuit card correctly"
Thats not real though. Slash there are other extenuating circumstances to lead me to believe dick is wanted
HOLY FUCK I SPELLED EXTENUATING RIGHT ON THE FIRST TRY. IM THE BEST DRUNK NA
I feel like my map app knows I'm hungover and is strategically not driving me by fast food places so I cannot stop
It finally happened my mom knowingly gave me money to buy drugs i knew this day would come\n
Is it in poor taste to drop acid before midnight mass?
I love this.
So just spent 30 minutes of my life talking to my cousins friend who told me she buys cocaine from a pizza place by asking for extra Parmesan
Randomize
