I found your undies. They were wrapped around my leg.
wooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
ooooooooooooo i'm drink
You need Jesus like Tony Danza needs another hit show.
I wish that vaginas would just grow when you're ready for sex. Like when you dont need your vagina its not there, but when you need it...BAM its there. then no one would see it when you get drunk
yeah...or you could just stop doing cartwheels in skirts
Hey, don't feel sorry for me, the two girls in front of me just ordered 18 dollars worth of taco bell. Life could be worse.
also found a pic of my head in the microwave from the other night.. hmm
Dude, chad is laying across the room, violently, passionately, pornographicly eating something and I seriously think the 'some thing' is fighting back.
make that a herd of moose. they will be my moose minions
He got me off while watching hockey. He's a keeper.
Got caught peeing in public. Sucks. It was a police station. Sucks worse.
I would go disguised as someone he didn't have premature ejaculative sex with but I don't know if I could stay in character.
I hate csi yet I find myself watching a full marathon. I am also eating hotdog buns stuffed with barbecue chips and they are quite tasty
should i feel bad about fucking you on my front lawn the day before you set me up with your best friend?
She just texted me saying "come over and eat me out, my vagina smells like honey glazed ham." I know I shouldn't be, but i'm just so curious.
I almost suffocated in that mask but she kept calling me Jeremy so I kept it on.
Randomize
