It looked like if robin williams had a vagina
He ripped my extensions out during sex, not noticing until this morning when he saw them on the floor. I told him they werent mine and he went and threw them in his sister's room.
I'm drinking away my Christmas cash. People are going to get bar receipts as presents.
Its official. I've reentered slutty territory. I was a condom away from having sex in a childs playhouse at a park. Oh and I lost my car keys.
You can't call dibs 8 years later.
I saw pigeons eating ur dried up puke today. Last night was fucking great
I think I'm drunk at the airport. Oh the possibilities
We were basically fucking on the dance floor. People kept buying us drinks. It really only encouraged us.
I'm in your room because it's a safe space. Is it ok to pee in here?
I just traded sex to frolic with a box of husky puppies. Is this rock bottom?
Dude. I keep thinking about how I let a man gum my vagina.
I'm to childless and to single to be asking myself why I'm so sticky
My new plan is to whip out my titties when they arrive. Maybe they won’t notice that I broke the couch fucking my boss...
Abby there's no shame in reading porn. It takes more work than watching I suppose
He's a security blanket. A security blanket who FUCKS.
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