its like my vagina has this homing beacon out to all the guys saying "come find me, i havent been shaved in weeks"
Exactly how deep of a burn should you have when you pee before becoming legitimately concerned?
when I woke up she was standing in the living room with a bottle of scotch because she is "allergic to hangovers"
For sure. We should see if we can get Mike to pay for one, and have a triple kegger... :o==& (that's future me projectile vomiting. i try to be goal oriented)
Dude my triple a card is good for bail. This is like a real live get out of jail free card
i think there mostly mad about the fact it was 6 pm not the fact i blew a .255
Just made macaroni burritos. Fukkin awesome. We'll have to try this when I'm sober.,!
Yep and i guess after he came back from that he sat down next to me and i just put my hand right on his penis just casually like it was his leg
I felt that there wouldn't be enough planB and forgiveness to go around
Also. When I die, I'm gonna have them put me in the casket naked and then have an open casket funeral. That will be my last chance to make people uncomfortable.
You kept asking us from the backseat if you were driving ok and then you kept talking to your hiccups and yelling at them to "stop it already!"
My guy issues hinge on tonight's game. Caps win, it's Dustin. Rangers win, Josh. I even flipped a coin to see who got what team
I can't even be mad at customs in houstons airport anymore for missing my flight and having to stay overnight. Within an hour of meeting we did it at her place. Her last word being "glad I could show you real southern hospitality". I'm definitely coming back here someday
Don't mind me, I'm just walking 2 miles across campus with no jacket, covered in highlighter, and carrying a hair extension. Gotta love miami!
Santi's no longer allowed to buy booze in my lane. Last thing I need is a midlife crisis looking at his Id again.
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