is it really this hard to find a guy i can fuck and have a good time with who doesn't ask where things are going btwn us?
you sound like my dream girl
We walk out of his house and his dad is there, so I had to meet him and shake his hand pretending that same hand hadn't been down his son's pants five minutes earlier
Time to put an end to this 'unprotected sex with crazy girls who have violent exes' trip I've been on so far this summer
dear roomies, would anyone wanna donate the booze they left in the fridge over break to the "your roomies snowed in and all alone" fund?
so im goin to clemson & my drug dealers goin to penn state. this is the hardest breakup EVER.
i found her half dressed with her feet in the washer..she said it was sooo warm.
i never thought it was possible to fit gay, redneck and asian into the same sentence before i met you.
and this wasn't even the first one i'd hooked up with
i talked to you about this last night, and you kept saying "he wants yo pusssaayyyyyy"
Would it be weird to jack off in the hospital?
Woke up naked on a bed full of money, doughnuts, and keys that weren't mine. Unsent dick pick on phone, and cheap cigar butt on my pillow. Also...I maybe hotwired my car.
Look at all the pictures I have of us sucking on jello syringes.
I mean, as I was vomiting in front of a giant crucifix I became acutely aware of my poor choices
The ride home was alright, we hooked up in the street next to his car after he smashed into the guard rail
I can't wait to shower all this regret off of me
and then the sword just ended up between my legs
Randomize
