LETS GET FUCKED UP IN ONESIES TONIGHT.
I worry about you sometimes...
so i turned around to do some reverse cowgirl when he said that this was such a better visual for him. Bad compliment or serious insult. i cant tell
Everytime I sleep with him he gives me another hint to what his tattoo means. I'm like a slutty Nancy Drew.
Just used your umbrella as a puke sheild. Thanks man.
Sorry, but you probably shouldn't come over. I'm too sober for this.
Ill give you a 4 hour blow job if you make my nephew go to bed.
Fair warning, if I start singing "Kiss Me, I'm Shitfaced" at any point tomorrow, just go with it
It got heated then she just left and I was all alone in the women's restroom.
He gave me twenty cool ranch tacos and declared, drunk, " Look, I do good"
Ummm so I'm at the hospital and just heard some guy get tazed......twice.
I'm out of breath and my thighs burn but at least it's over.
So anyways, we returned the toilet paper and decided to use the money for taco bell and slurpees instead...
I FOUND A VIBRATOR IN MY BABY BROTHERS ROOM. IM FREAKIN OUT MAN ITS BIGGER THEN MINE
put it back and chill out ok
NO FUCK HES 15 WHO EVEN SOLD HIM THAT HES A BABY
I texted him "my vagina is pounding for you"
I know, you made me proof read it.
Thank you for always being there for me.
Sorry wrong derek... Do u have any weed?
Randomize
