so i stopped by cvs on the way home this morning, turns out hallmark doesnt make an im sorry my friend puked on your friend card, call me if were still speaking
Their flight hasn't even left yet and the 'buy food to keep yourself alive' budget is gone on tequila.
I'd like to say he was whispering sweet nothings into my ear all night but really he was just whispering "pussyyy"
I feel like hell. The amount of black beans I found in my hair tells me I hit rock bottom
Don't worry. This time I'll get black out drunk so they'll just think it's an American thing.
2 men making out for 2 seconds to trick a cop so they don't get arrested for being pulled over rolling a blunt is not gay.
She was bending and I said "finally, about time". Wrong, she was tying her shoe. No blowjobs for me.
Soo I woke up in the storage room at best western....I dont even know what say
it's ok, no one ever died fom being sticky.
i've gotta research that and get back to you.
I am so sorry for drunk texting you r kelly lyrics
How the fuck can he download so much porn but not know how to find the Skype app?
I was thrusting to the beat of Felix Navidad..
I'm texting you know although you won't get this until you wake up. the only reason you are strapped to your bed is because you were trying to fly out your window.
you said, "the pool was totally tequila. and i left my shoe halfway across town. and by shoe i mean car" it appeared to me that you didn't have your shoes or car.
i just used your hair clip to unclog my bong. i miss you so much!
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