DOES ANYONE KNOW THE NINJA TURTLES
life lesson# 3: saying thank you on a subway really means "im not a native new yorker, so please feel free to touch my ass"
hmm. interesting. explain how you came across this knowledge.
i sneezed. he said bless you. i said thank you. he groped. i again said thank you.
in retrospect, i probably shouldn't have referred to his dick as "travel size"
i told her that i loved her pillow breasts and then she asked me if i wanted to motor boat them. so yea, i do need the room tonite.
My gaydar just like overheated and exploded watching the male figure skaters on the olympics
No I'm not proud of you for not sleeping with him. He has herpes. You don't get a gold star for behaving how you're expected to. Trust me. I'm a teacher.
Pretty sure I'm taking the break up well. Alcohol made me okay with it and drugs keep me agreeing with why I dumped him in the first place.
Just pull your dick out and wink at her, its a game changing play
This guy on the bus keeps leaning over and sniffing my hair.
I don't know if we can compare high school reunions anymore. The keg stands started before 7.
All I have are vague memories of us eating ham?
You wear a dinosaur suit one time and everyone thinks you're a furry. Fucking hell, man.
I'm glad we smoked together,that was probs the biggest sibling bonding we will ever have.
I had sex with two guys in one day. One on my grandma's couch, one on a golf course. This is the greatest post-surgery accomplishment I could ask for.
Yeah I'm just gonna stay here and spread my horniness to the world.
Randomize
