That guy youre talking to looks like Brian from Family Guy.
Just saw Youth in Revolt. There are only so many times Michael Cera can lose his virginity.
screw that ipod for my birthday.. i just want a weed brownie the size of my face. that's all.
I wonder if he just picks random boners to send or just the realy impressive ones
I feel I need to conquer him. He's six ft eight and 265lbs. Its like the mount Everest of sex.
I just realized I am holding a beer in 133 out of 134 photos of me on my facebook page.
Nobody is perfect
I'm at Waffle House wearing one of the paper hats in the other
Then you ran outside and said you were gonna give the snowman a blowjob
2010 has been the year of the Eskimo brother. Let's see how many igloos we can shack in next year
Everytime I know she spent a lot of time on her hair for one of our dates, I intentionally cum on the top of her head. That's how she knows I pay attention.
Dude, she brought over peach cobbler, weed and alcohol plus I'm gonna get laid. She's by far the coolest sister you have.
But he does seem to be getting proper humping etiquette down. So there's progress.
I found an inside smoking lounge. I'll be here for the next 4 hours. A nice old Canadian lady has befriended me and let me use her lighter. Fuck Hartsfield-Jackson AND this layover. I win.
valentines day is a day for loved ones to share. So me and my vibrator. Happy holidays.
I'm sobbing to NWA
I JUST AGREED TO GO TO A CHILD'S BIRTHDAY PARTY AT A PLACE CALLED PUZZLE'S FUN DOME WHY DO I HATE MYSELF
Randomize
