Tell him ill love him long time
I'll assure him of it
also, you're talking to the girl for whom "deformed baby arm" wasn't quite a dealbreaker.
DUUUDE!! just found out that the fbi has a kids page. guess who's got a new jumior officer printout badge?
So I think his penis grew over the weekend. Is that possible or does absence make the dick grow longer?
God she is annoying. I am only keeping her around on fb because I want to see if her baby comes out looking like an alien or not.
yeah...that's gonna come up in court
It's been two days. I am still burping up jello. Everything tastes like jello. Everything smells like jello. I am DONE with jello shots.
With a breakfast like weed and a fun size twix before a dentist appointment you can see exactly how I handle being an adult
YOU WORK IN THE US CAPITOL! YOU CANNOT HAVE SEX IN THE BATHROOM!!
Dude, you are totally ruining intern season for me...
Of the 4 nights I've gone downtown this week, I've been "piss in the parking lot" drunk 5 times
Do u remember giving me permission to fuck ur dad and then getting super pissed at me when i said ew?
My mom is currently drinking alone in our kitchen singing the Dixie Chicks to herself so, hey, alcohol is forever and we should not be shamed for its use.
Never in my life did I think i would give a blow job in the bathroom of my old elementary school. Twice.
He called out my ex's name during sex.
Alex is a pretty common unisex name.
It was the same Alex. I asked.
Yo did you say we are blacking out saturday night and playing dodgeball?
Yeah for relay for life. Its for cancer
Randomize
