i blacked out hard core.. it was bad peeeed muh bed
i hate when i ask a girl what she's being for halloween and the first word isn't "slutty"
his mom and I have the same butterfly tramp stamp. don't ask how that came up
I will be sticking my dick in something this weekend. You can either be that something or not. Your decision.
But seriously he was like a god with his hands. My vagina feels annointed.
I feel like I got hit by a bus. A head on collision with my vag.
This drunk girl wants you to know that I do actually like you. I'm not just using you for sex. I think you're cool.
I do have a life. It just consists of making scarves and chesse straws now
You kept saying you we're gonna puke and wanted to steal my pants
That does not explain the remnants of a small fire in my bathtub.
In the world of sexual, erotic texting, you rank somewhere between "how much teeth do you want" and "how dry do you want it"
Also, I want you to know, that not only am I apparently the expert on sexting. Our bishop is consulting me later. So my talents are varied.
is one penis in the hand worth one better nicer penis in the manscaped bush?
You told me you were with a dog dressed as a taco, and it was the only one you trusted
We figured you were on something when you said that your nipples couldn't hear the music.
The amount of guys I've turned down for you is disgusting... You better love me.
Randomize
