You kept shouting "Relax and take notes" every time before you would hit the blunt
well when mom kept referring to my "black hole of a vagina" and how i devoured all the nuts at the party like i was a pro, i figured my stay was up.
I no longer see him as a simple set of male genitalia attached to a very sexy body. The title "trophy fuck" seems wrong. Damn.
No, i will not have sex with him again. It felt like he was trying to bulldoze his way through me. My vagina is on strike.
Let's play, "guess how long my Neighbours have been watching me dance naked".
Sidenote: do you recall your "give me the d" chant
My vagina feels like it's been kissed by angels.
Chicks, chicks everywhere, and not a drop to drink. Dude, when did real life lesbians get HOT?
You've never sent a girl a dick pic?
Call me old fashioned
I feel like you're gonna be reading this at 6 AM in a ditch or under a bridge, but please remember...I offered to drive you home. And you said no.
The sad thing is that it's 6:45 and you're not far off.
I'm still alive btw, in case you were worried about my well being.
I told him I want him to read me my Miranda rights while he's fucking me. Act exactly like he does while he's on duty except with his dick out.
Dude i woke up today by a pile of fried chicken and wearing a bra
.......stop going to frat parties....
I just got a handjob in the back of an Uber while a large German dude and a Midwestern fuck-boi sang along in falsetto to the Bohemian Rhapsody.
Hot fire fighters installing my closet. Don't know how to go about this. Gonna nonchalantly take my shirt off and see what happens..
Randomize
