the not having weed thing wouldnt be nearly as tragic if it wasnt the one holiday where they launch bright flaming things into the air
This is why I shouldn't be left alone with liquor and anticipation.
I used to practice getting hit by cars.
When i asked him what happened all he said was, the toucan... the toucan... over and over again.
He said he got a lot of action last night. I asked how much? And he said he got to see down her shirt. Freshmen never cease to amaze me.
I blacked out the second time 3am rolled around. My brain was taking a beating trying to do that math.
I feel uncockblockable...banged her in the bathroom with my iv still in
matt and i tucked you in... you REFUSED to move your head from under the bed.
She came to the party with six kegs and a life sized portrait of Lavar Burton. SHE WILL BE MY WIFE.
For looking exactly like her, she tasted less like her sister than I would've thought
Theres a point where you stop and say hey....as high as I am on LSD right now ...I`m just a man covered in paint
somehow this went from sexting to explaining my eating disorder.
Ok because I want to set a new world record for how fast I can drink away my Christmas money
I basically have the attention span of a ferret on meth when it comes to men
My dreams last night were filled with sex and quidditch.
Randomize
