if she shaves her mustache, i'll let her give me head
Passing las posas road. In a world of pain. Im trying to piss in a bottle through the hole in my crotch. I wish i had a bigger dick.
She wants her shit back. Clearly she missed the cheaters-get-their-shit-ritually-burned clause.
i made two phi delts show me their dicks in less than 30 words! Take that twitter!
I go to guys houses late at night, have a little fun, come back by dawn having made their life a little bit better. I am the official blow job fairy.
The only way I made it through work was reminding myself how many margaritas per hour I was making
Jesus christ how hard is BRING SNACKS AND DRUGS to interpret? I trust your judgement on this one.
my roommate just showed me the scar on her forehead... that she got from a shake weight... That. just. happened.
He sent me a mirror pic of himself and sent it to me and all i could think about was the amazing bong hits i took with his roommate in that bathroom.
Below this exterior of ice is a layer of cum. Followed by a pool of gin. More cum. Then, finally a heart.
Played never have I ever with high schoolers today. Needless to say they brought up threesomes so I had to make a judgement call and decided to not put my finger down
Danny put 5 hr energy in the jungle juice (that brilliant bastard) and I almost showed my penis to Alex. It was a rough night.
I’m honestly just flattered that you think I could make PornHub’s Top 10.
I hope that will b the last time i take off my pants in the chemistry building.
I don’t know how you celebrated 4/20 but I set a Payless trash can on fire
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