If my boyfriend wants to eat his own jizz after masturbating, what does that make him?
Remember when we were trying to guess how many people could fit in my shower? The answer is 7
maybe i get so drunk and make stupid mistakes cuz Subconsiously im preparing for my real world debut
can i drink enough to forget this semester even happened?
Dude let's go to Saudi Arabia. They outlawed valentine's day. And probably love.
Next time I say "Watch this" Get me the fuck out of the bar.
That combination of brocholi bacon eggs cheese ketchup and pasta would have been a revaltion had you not thrown up on the stove and put out the pilot light
your ex girlfriend just barged in my house, drunk, mumbled something about "car strip", and put a huge hole in my drywall with her head.
He sent me a snap chat of his naked torso with cookies over his nipples. Like.... that does not make me want you homeboy.
sex on the stairs. not our finest idea.
I thought one was bad but really there are two woman stupid enough to marry our brother...unreal
I’m a go ahead and fuck down ATL. So when I leave in January I’ll have no regrets.
skipped tacos for a blowjob. No tacos. No blowjob. More importantly...no tacos. Wtf?
There's a hole in our hallway wall. Don't hate me. I'll fix it. It's only about the size of a beach ball. I promise to never scale walls in our apartment ever again. Don't hate me. I love you.
I was supposed to see Marcus tonight and he cancelled. Listen, I shaved my butt hole. Somebody is getting this WAP 😂😂😂😂
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