i'm in the sorta mood where i wanna be that crying, drunk girl who will hook up with anyone that tells her she's pretty
So i'm in mason getting an ultrasound.. and there are a bunch of hicks in here with their wild ass children and this one young mom yells at her kid "harley sit!"
You should introduce yourself as garth. As in garth brooks.
i wish there was an iPhone app that lets you write a TeXt LiKe tHiS
dude...come out of the closet already
I need to stop researching the drugs I do on Wikipedia. The parts about abuse and dependency hit too close to home
At Wal-Mart last night I watched two guys scramble for $4.34 to pay for a pack of ping pong balls and red solo cups. They had to put the .34 on a credit card. Winter break begins!
im not sure. I kicked him in the ear last night trying to kick a plastic cup off his head to prove I can kick higher than anyone.
He wouldn't give me a cup of water for my bong so i sat in the drive thru to run up the timer until he gave it to me.
It's almost like a boob-text, but it's not. Because it was live. And you were showing a bunch of people.
Well, we broke up and instead of putting my shit out on the curb like a normal person, she fucking donated everything to Goodwill. So now I have to pay two dollars for one of my own t shirts.
Went home with a male stripper who looked like Justin Timberlake.. I started singing cry me a river mid sex. When he sang along I fell in love
Good dick will make you do a lot of things… Great dick will make you consider buying a house.
I was floored. Like way less concerned with him using drugs than I am with him not believing in evolution.
Hey, remember that time a week ago when we walk-of-shamed literally down the Vegas Strip at 8:45am and I had one broken heel?
Fuck it, I work hard. I deserve nice sex toys
I have more important things to worry about than you drowning your cheerios in tequila.
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